Having a bad year? Well, perhaps it's been a bit of a wild journey. But while it could be enticing to crawl under the covers until the year ends, we have a better idea: Sales Humor! We understand it's not a cure-all for a worldwide epidemic and following an economic downturn, but we're optimistic one of them will make you grin. Or, at the very least, a sneer. So here are 13 salespeople jokes to help you through your next Phone or skype call. 13 Salesman Puns and Jokes 1. This... is different from how contests are done. At the start of a new month, a sales manager addresses an underperforming sales force: "This month, we will have a sales competition. The winners will be eligible to compete in the next month's event." 2. A ready-made retort for the next time a customer delays you. 3. Can you demonstrate how to accomplish this with AirPods? 4. We are amused because it is true. "A software manager, a hardware manager, and a marketing manager are on their way to a meeting when one of their tires blows out." They step out of the vehicle and examine the issue. "I can't do anything about it - it's a hardware problem," explains the software manager. "Perhaps if we switched the car off and on again, it might fix itself," explains the hardware manager. "Hey, 75% of everything is functioning - let's ship it!" says the marketing manager. 5. Back when in-person sales were popular. Boss: Have you received any orders today? Salesman: I have two! Boss: Congratulations! What exactly were they? "Get out!" says the salesman. And "Stay away!" 6. There's nothing a little Botox can't solve. 7. To the right and up? 8. Say what you want about Zoom happy hours, but we are paid to drink wine over here. 9. We've determined that every Office-related meme qualifies as a sales joke. 10. Points for effort. On my way to Seattle, I was at the airport VIP lounge a few weeks ago. I observed Bill Gates lounging comfortably in the corner, sipping a drink. I was supposed to meet a very important customer traveling to Seattle, but she was running late. I approached the Microsoft chairman, introduced myself, and asked, "Mr. Gates, I wonder if you would do me a favor?" "Yes?" "I'm just over there," I say, indicating my seat at the bar, "and I'm waiting on a very important customer." Would you be so nice as to stroll by and say, 'Hi Ray,' when she arrives?" "Sure." I shook his hand, thanked him, and returned to my seat. My customer arrived around five minutes later. We ordered a drink and got down to work. I felt a touch on my shoulder a few minutes later. Bill Gates was there. "Hello, Ray," he said. "Screw off, Gates; I'm in a meeting," I said. 11. Is there going to be another prequel? What was Yoda's first lead? He took advantage of the Sales Force. 12. Don't hesitate to get in touch with our engineering department. A door-to-door salesperson was pushing his products to a homeowner who didn't appear interested in anything. "How about this?" suggested the salesperson. "It's a new product on the market." "What exactly is it?" inquired the homeowner. "It's called a thermos," the salesperson said. "It keeps things hot and things cold." "That is incredible!" remarked the homeowner. "How does it know?" 13. Simply grin and nod. Salesperson: This computer will reduce your burden by half. Office Manager: That's fantastic; I'll take two.
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